Saturday, June 06, 2020

Pre-marital Counseling

Getting married? Reality check strongly advised!

For the rest of your life... Seem like a long time? It is. What are you doing to make sure your marriage will last? Over 50% of marriages will fail. Within the faith community the percentages are no different.
If you are like most couples you will spend more time planning your wedding than any other event in your life.You will pick out colors, choose the wedding party, decide who will sit with whom, plan your honeymoon, and select the flavor of the punch. All this will take more time than actually planning your life together. At Means Family Counseling Center, we can help you put the “glue” in your life plan. By having sessions with a trained and licensed marriage and family therapist, you will learn how you and your future spouse deal with key relational issues, how to capitalize on your strengths, and work through possible areas of conflict. This investment will help you begin your relationship on solid foundations.
Why should you consider premarital counseling? Consider the facts...
  • 1 in 2 marriages don’t last.
  • We often bring significant unconscious “baggage” from our past into our current relationships.
  • The differences in our family backgrounds and expectations can innocently create conflict in our marriage.
  • Your marriage is one of the biggest commitments of your life.
  • Most couples believe that whatever conflicts they have will “magically” be worked out after marriage.
  • Most brides think that “he will be different after we are married.”
  • The average wedding will cost $12,000-15,000.
  • You will most likely be attracted to someone that is opposite of your personality style in many ways.
  • Most couples have major relationship conflicts within the first months of their marriage.
  • Many couples are surprised by behavior after their marriage they didn’t see in the dating process.
  • Most couples will spend more time selecting their wedding cake than in pre-marital counseling.
  • What you believe about God, family, habits, interests, sexuality, and love can draw you together or pull you apart.
  • If either one was sexually abused as a child, they will eventually struggle with sexual intimacy.
Pre-Marital Counseling Sessions
Testing for each couple is a required part of counseling. We use several different personality tests which will help you and your counselor gain insight into your relationship.
  • The Taylor-Johnson Temperament Analysis Criss/Cross Test
  • The DiSC Test and...
  • One of the following PREPARE tests: There are basically five categories of couples which we focus on…
Prepare: for pre-marital couples
Prepare-MC: for pre-marital couples with children
Mate: for couples over 50 getting married, se eking marriage enrichment, or going through a significant transition in their lives
Enrich: for marriage enrichment or marriage counseling
Prepare-CC: for cohabiting couples with or without children

The following dynamics are measured...
  • Communication
  • Conflict resolution
  • Personality issues
  • Marriage expectations
  • Financial management
  • Leisure activities
  • Sexual relationship
  • Children/parenting
  • Family/friends
  • Role relationship
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Couple closeness
  • Family closeness
  • Couple flexibility
  • Family flexibility